I Hate Telling People This...

Back about four years ago, when The Boy was a sophomore in high school, I decided we were getting the heck out of here and moving to Florida to be near the beach.  It was surprisingly easy to get The Boy to buy into the idea, even though he despises the beach.  It's too sandy and sunny and windy for him.  I think we were just both ready for a new start back then beach or not.

Because of the custody arrangement and the fact The Boy's dad lives here in Birmingham, I expected a battle of some sort.  In keeping with the demands of the divorce decree, I wrote The Boy's dad a long letter telling him we were moving and I would provide him with our new address as soon as we had one.  I sat back and waited, expecting a dispute.

I was shocked when there wasn't much of battle from his dad.  I don't even remember what the response was, but I do remember it wasn't much.  The Boy and I were good to go.

I informed my mom and she, of course, said no.  She said I didn't need to move.  Every once in a while I would get some sort of email card from her telling me to "listen to my mother!"  She sent a singing monkey card once that said I needed to listen to her and I was NOT moving to Florida.

During that time, I got a Florida real estate license so I was licensed in Florida and Alabama, I put my house on the market and I started looking for jobs in Pensacola since I didn't think I could make it on real estate alone down there.

Months went by.  My house sat on the market.  I couldn't find a job.  My mom sent me death threats (just joking! Only singing monkeys).

I got an offer on my house, finally, but it fell through.  Then, The Boy found out about a technology school that he could go to his Junior and Senior year to learn about computers/information technology. In the mornings he would be at his normal high school, but after lunch he would take the bus 30 minutes down the road to the tech school.  He really wanted to do it, so I took the house off the market and we stayed.

Unfortunately, for some time after that (and even now) people think I've moved.  For a while I would show up for local races and they would say things like, "Hey, I thought you moved to Florida." or "Didn't you move to Florida?"

For years I have had to explain that, "No, I'm still here.  Haven't moved. "  Sometimes I would give explanations, sometimes not.  It really got to be a pain.

Now The Murph and I have been planning on moving after Christmas and Florida and Georgia are on our short list, but we are open.  Wherever there are job opportunities,  since we both need real jobs at some point.  Which brings me to why I am writing this post.

Today I was in my car dodging traffic trying to keep up with The Running Nazi, when my cell phone rang.  It was B from my stock broker's office calling to tell me they can't direct deposit into my checking account.  I hadn't talked to her in a while so we started catching up.  I helped her purchase her house a few years back and my son and her daughter went to the same high school.

She needed my address and asked me if that was where The Murph and I were going to live after we were married.  I knew it was probably a bad idea to say anything, but at that point I told her we were moving.  I knew as the words came out of my mouth, where B was going to go with it.  Sure enough she said what 20 million people (I'm exaggerating) have said to me during the past four years, "Weren't you moving to Florida a few years ago???" And there's always this tone they have in their voice when the say it.  Or is that just my imagination?

I know!  I hate to even tell people we are moving.  The Murph and I have "been moving" now for at least 4 or 5 years.  We were moving before we even knew each other.  And we were both moving to Florida.  That's part of what makes us a good match, isn't it?  Wanting to move to Florida and all...

What makes it even worse is that we really do kind of live in both places now since there's the condo down there.  It just adds to the confusion.

We really have to move now or I'm going to have to stop telling people that we are moving.  Believe me, no body's more confused about what I'm doing and where I am than I am!  What if The Murph gets a job here and we stay?  Then for the next 5 years I will have to explain to people that we're still here.  Didn't move.  Why?  Why not?  Because...

I'm still here... damn it!

One Bridesmaid Is M.I.A - Update

Jim Hjelm Fall 2012 Collection

 I finally have a bridesmaid dress picked out.  It has The Girl's approval.  I haven't heard from my other bridesmaid, The Running Nazi, but I think she will like it too.  Unfortunately, The Running Nazi is missing in action.  I haven't heard from her since July 27, according to our last exchange of emails.  I was at the beach, she texted me about doing a long run, but I couldn't do a long run with her that weekend since I was out of town.

We were suppose to do a long run last Sunday, but she never responded to my message.

I called and left a message on her cell phone yesterday at 1 pm.  No response.  I emailed a link to the dress to her last night.  No response.  This morning I sent her another email which goes directly to her cell phone.  In this message I included, "Please respond because I am very worried about you!"

If this was The Boy not responding to me like he did a few times last year while at college, I would add, "If I don't get a response within the hour, I am calling the police.  They will be knocking at your dorm room door."  This always works with The Boy, but since The Running Nazi is an adult and not my child, I'm not sure what to do.

The Running Nazi is very busy working almost 24/7 in her new job so maybe she is busy and doesn't have time to respond.  I think if something was seriously wrong, her husband would respond to my texts and/or emails.  Don't you think?

I also know she can't be mad at me because of the blog posts about her because I've told her about some of them and she never gets on my blog and reads them.  I don't think she even remembers how to get on my blog.  She doesn't even remember her Facebook password and how to get on Facebook.  She is too busy for that time wasting stuff and could care less about it.

I'm not that busy except when I'm working out, so I'm on it everyday.

As for the bridesmaid dress,  it is part of the Jim Hjelm Fall 2012 collection.  I like the dress in the color, azalea.  Azalea is a darker pink that I think will look great for a Fall wedding.  Azalea is very close to the berry color that is on the wedding invitations.  It will have to be special ordered since it is part of the Fall 2012 collection and isn't in stores yet.  Rush order since the wedding is in October.

I hope The Running Nazi likes it.  Once I find her, I will know if she does or not....

I am very worried about her!

UPDATE ON THE RUNNING NAZI'S WHEREABOUTS:  The Running Nazi has been found!  She finally returned my call yesterday evening as she was heading to her hotel somewhere in LA.  That's Lower Alabama, not that other LA out in California.   She explained that she has been really busy working almost non-stop and hasn't been able to run or work out at all.  Also, her cell phone doesn't have very good signal in some of those LA towns.  She also said something about a fish camp.  (shivers!)  

Overall, she's sort of fine, but sort of not, but at least she's okay.   She said she would look at the pictures of the dress when she got to her hotel.  We lost signal before we could officially end the conversation and I haven't heard from her since then, but she was going to have a busy day today in LA.

Crazy Fools Who Don't Know How To Budget

I am pretty sure that the Running Nazi is coming a little unglued.  I'm concerned.  It just isn't physically possible to work five days a week from 6 am until sometimes 3 am.  This only leaves 3 hours of sleep.  She is doing 17 to 18 mile runs on the weekend, as well.  Today we only ran 10 miles because I haven't run long in 3 weeks and didn't want to get injured.   I ran with the Running Nazi and our friend K, who I will call Morgan Freeman (MF for short, hehe) because that's exactly who he looks like.  I mean identical!

At first glance, the Nazi seemed fine.  Five miles into the run and she got a wee bit cranky.

But cranky, in a friendly way.  She's very friendly.

The state of our swimming pool was not the subject of choice today.

Subject of choice started with the Murph and my honeymoon location.  (which we haven't decided on yet).

This discussion led to our wedding budget, which we have a total amount we plan to spend, but that amount is not broken down into individual categories yet because we haven't interviewed any florist, photographers, etc and have only a general idea of how much each of those things will be.  The only thing that we have lined up and have an estimate for is the ceremony and reception site with food and alcohol expenditures.  Alcohol being the most important thing, of course.

The Running Nazi had some really good ideas for honeymoon spots such as Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Canary Islands, etc.  St. Lucia, she approved, but not Sandals Resort in St. Lucia.  Too mainstream she said.  Who wants to go where everybody goes?

MF stayed out of the conversation for the most part, but did suggest London and said he would come visit us and go to the Olympics.  I informed him that the Olympics would be over by the time we got to London. (if that's where we go, which isn't likely)

Somehow this entire conversation turned to where the money was going to be allotted for the wedding and how much was going to the honeymoon.  The Running Nazi decided that the Murph and I needed a better budget and we were about to spend way more money on things that we could get for less and therefore have more money left over for the honeymoon.  I told her we really had no idea yet how much each thing was going to cost because we haven't gotten any estimates yet, so I had no idea how much money would be left for the honeymoon.

The Running Nazi decided right then and there at mile 8 1/2 of the run that the Murph and I were damn fools and didn't know how to budget anything.  (or clean a pool)  She then reminded me that it's not our first go around.  I reminded her that the Murph has never had a wedding with friends and family and that it is important to him. Even if it means spending a little more money to get it the way we want.

When I got home I told the Murph what the Running Nazi had said.  We got a good laugh.  The Murph said, " You tell that little Nazi that we haven't even started blowing money on the wedding.  Just give us some time and we will more than likely screw up a good budget.  Not fair to be accused when we haven't even gotten started yet!"

She knows us too well!

I will be glad when the Running Nazi gets some rest and relaxation!  I am thinking about putting her in charge of our budget.  We actually would have a better chance of following it that way.

I'm glad she didn't mention the swimming pool.

Running Nazi Strikes Again

Well, once again I fell for one of the Running Nazi's little tricks.  This time I was rested and well hydrated so I didn't suffer as much as I have in the past.

And we didn't get lost this time.

It all started when I met her for lunch Friday and she said she was going to run 12 miles this morning so I said I would meet her and run with her since she was running under 13 miles.

This morning when I got to the run start,  she suggested we run a little different course than we usually run.

 I very naively said "Sure!"

Big mistake.

We took off running and about 7 miles into it she says she hopes she remembers the correct turns. (where have I heard that before!)   She kept calculating how much this loop was going to be and then add this street and that and we would be at 12 miles by the time we got back to our cars.

I wasn't paying much attention as we were running along and chatting until I started to get hungry so I looked at my watch and realized we had been running almost 3 hours!

Now we run kind of slow and we stop to drink a couple of times along the course, but it NEVER takes us 3 hours to run 12 miles.

I mentioned how long we had been running to the Running Nazi and she says "Oh, yeah, we did that loop and then we added this and.... but we stopped a lot too...."

Not over 45 minutes worth of stopping!

Finally she admitted that we would probably be at around 15 miles by the time we got back to the car.

I'm not sure, but I think she had planned this the entire time.   She knew if it was a course unfamiliar to me that I would have no idea what mile we were at in the run.  I never would figure it out if I didn't know how long we had run. I'm just not that smart.

She knows this.

I am still trying to calculate how many miles we really ran today.  Was it only 15??

 I've run long enough to know approximately how long it takes me to run 12 miles.  And it's not 3 hours.

So much for keeping my long runs at 13 miles and under when I'm not training for a marathon or Ironman.

Dammit, she's done it again!

Will Run For Beer- Mercedes Marathon Weekend

Yesterday was race day.  The Running Nazi and I ran in the Mercedes Half Marathon.  This is one of the biggest (if not the biggest) running event in Alabama.  It sort of started as the Freeze your half off run that was held this same time every year.  The Freeze your half off was my very first ever 1/2 marathon and also my fastest in under 1 hr 42 minutes.

In 2002, they did away with the Freeze your half off and created the Mercedes Marathon and 1/2 marathon.  That year I did the full Mercedes Marathon in an attempt to qualify for the Boston Marathon.  It was my first marathon and the most memorable.  I ran a 3 hrs 47 minute marathon missing the Boston qualifying time by 2 minutes.  I ran into my old running buddy D yesterday after the race.  We put in a lot of miles together training for those marathons and trying to qualify.  D ran the half yesterday and told me she was doing Boston again.  It was great seeing her and catching up.  I did eventually qualify for Boston that same year at the Huntsville Rocket City Marathon.

The Mercedes Marathon gets bigger every year.  This year both events filled up before the weekend expo even started.  For the first time ever, nobody could sign up at the expo.  There were thousands of people there Sunday morning in the 20 degree temps.  The Running Nazi and I bought a couple of disposable jackets at the expo for $8.  Yes, you can really buy disposable clothing here to pollute the environment.  We weren't being very green, but we did stay warm at the beginning of the race and disposed the jackets along the course after we warmed up.

I decorated mine the night before with some motivational quotes.  I think it  helped all the fellow runners that were passing me.  They were kicking my ass and feeling very inspired by the quotes on the jacket.  I'm positive.  Especially the one about Pain being temporary, but Internet results lasting forever.  That will make anyone run faster!  I have proof that this quote really inspired by all the super fast times all the runners posted.

Ken's vote on the funniest quote (because it was the lamest) was "Why are all these people following me?" Ms. Harry Potter liked that quote the best too.  She was there in her disposable jacket and I helped decorate it for her, of course.  I even remembered Mom on the front jacket sleeve.  I was suppose to wave to her when I saw the news cameras and I was going to raise my arm up so she could see where I had written "Hi Mom".   However,  I didn't see any news cameras and she didn't see me.  I was running too fast.

This was The Running Nazi and me when we got to the race start.  Don't worry, I brought my Sharpie pen so we could "decorate" the Nazi's jacket before the race started.  She wanted "Will Run For Beer" written across her back and a heart in honor of Valentine's Day.

We finished the race in under 1 hr 55 min and then headed inside to use the restrooms and warm up and hydrate before heading back out to run 7 more miles.  It was our last 20 miler before the marathon we are running in next month.  My calves are killing me!  So glad it's taper time and I have two 20 milers and a couple of 1/2 marathon races under my belt to help me prepare this time.

Conspiracy

Today I actually got up at 4:30 a.m to do a long run with the Running Nazi and another friend, who I will call "Ms. Harry Potter" or just Ms. Harry for short.  Ms Harry is actually a female, but she is obsessed with Harry Potter books, movies, etc so that's what The Running Nazi's hubby, Mr. Running Nazi calls her, so that's good enough for me.  I was rather proud of myself for this increasingly rare act of  training discipline.  Once upon a time, I was very anal about my training plan, but now I rarely have a training plan to get anal about.  These days that's the way I prefer it.

This morning there was a very large group of runners, who are training for a local marathon/1/2 marathon and today they were running the marathon course which is two 13.1 mile loops.  The group was meeting at 6:30 a.m. and some were doing the entire 13.1 mile loop (the marathoners) and some were doing an 8 mile loop (the half marathoners).  We decided to park about 3 miles away and run to where the group was starting, run the 13.1 mile loop with them, then run back the 3 miles to our car and then add another mile to run a total of 20 miles in all.  The Running Nazi and I are training for a later marathon than this one so we needed the 20 miler.   Their marathon is in two weeks so this group was tapering.

Initially, The Running Nazi and I were going to park where the training group was meeting and start with them to do the loop and then add on later.  Yesterday, I receive a text from the Nazi saying that there was a "large" group of runners doing 20 miles and they were meeting down the road at some mysterious church, the place changed twice before it was decided.  I had my suspicions.  Was this just another ploy of The Nazi to get me out a little further away from the group so if I changed my mind and got to my car I wouldn't be able to just quit at 13 miles and head home for coffee and a biscuit?  I would have to actually run the extra miles to the car at this church where the "large" group of 20 mile runners were supposedly meeting instead.  Also, this was 5:30 in the morning and it was still dark and we were meeting in an area that I feel isn't the safest.  It's kind of creepy when it's dark, but it's near Ms. Harry's apartment and I also think that she prefers to run from her apartment rather than drive somewhere.  Besides, she and the Nazi love running from there think the area is safe and that I'm just being a paranoid baby.

The Nazi already knows I don't care to run in this area of town alone, early in the morning, when it's still dark or with just the 3 of us women running alone, in the dark, at an ungodly hour.  Did I say it was dark?  I didn't like parking my car there and leaving it either.  Before I could even protest the place or the hour, The Nazi offered to pick me up and drive me to the meeting place and assured me that there was going to be a lot of people at this church to run with us.  I asked her how many people, who they were,  names, addresses, social security numbers (just joking on the last three).  She didn't know, but Ms. Harry assured her that there was going to be A LOT of people.

I reluctantly agreed, but had serious doubts about it all.

The Nazi picked me up and we headed to the church to meet the large 20 miler group near Ms. Harry's place.  We get there, it's pitch black, the place looks deserted, no runners at the church.  Surprise!  We park and see Ms. Harry running toward us.  She tells us to come on and we'll just keep running on by the church if we don't see anybody there.  NOBODY was there.  It was dark, it was creepy.   We had 3 miles to run, in the dark, all alone, to get to where the real large group of runners were beginning.  I'm looking around for thugs, crazy people, rabid dogs, who knows what could be out there in the dark around the corner to grab us.

It's barely 6 a.m and I am out of my cozy bed where I would've been snuggling next to Ken with little Cadence curled up next to me, purring and instead I am in the freezing cold, dark, scary streets running with a Running Nazi and Ms. Harry Potter, who I am starting to suspect to be two crazy nut cases.  These crazies were running and chit chatting like they were having the best time, catching up, girl talk and I'm looking around, thinking we were going to get mugged any minute, even though all I had on me was some chap stick and a couple GU.

When we finally got to the place where the REAL large group was starting, I was extremely happy.  I can't begin to tell you how happy I was.  Civilization!   I told The Running Nazi I was going to blog bad things about her.  Not to mention the fact that she kept trying to add more miles to our 20 miler.  I was keeping count of the mileage though.  If not we would've run 24 or 25 miles today.  She said she really, really, really didn't know that nobody would show up for the 20 miler.  That Ms. Harry had told her there was going to be people running with us.  A LOT of them.  I have my doubts.  Now I think The Nazi and Ms. Harry have a conspiracy going to get me up to run at ungodly hours just to scare the shit out of me.  I'm onto them now.

First "Annual" Christmas House Party

Last night the Murph and I had our first "annual" Christmas house party.   I think everybody had a good time.  I know that the Murph and I had a great time with our friends that we haven't seen in a while.  What a busy, busy week it was with the final moving, repairing and closing on my house and then preparing the Murph's house for the party.  I am glad we had all the decorations finished Thanksgiving weekend.  The Murph started cleaning Thursday afternoon while I was at closing and then Friday we had our designated food items to pick up.  I think it turned out pretty good.  We had about 20 people with lots of beer and wine and way too much food.  We've been eating leftovers all day today.

The last of our friends left after 2 a.m. so we didn't get to bed till late, then we slept in and stayed home all day.  We didn't even go to the gym to workout.  I'm still in my pj's.  There was an amazing amount of empty wine bottles scattered throughout the kitchen this morning.   We forgot to put any non-alcoholic drinks in the cooler, but nobody asked for anything so I guess everybody was ok with the beer and wine.  Finally got a picture of my best buddies, the Running Nazi and the Babysitter and me all together in one place with make up on and no running clothes or pony tails.  I didn't get any pictures of the food or any in the kitchen or dining room where the majority of our friends were hanging out.  We were too busy having fun and I totally forgot to take pictures until the end of the party.  Oh well, here's all the ones I got, not very many.  I will try to do better at the Murph's annual Super Bowl party.

The Babysitter, The Running Nazi,  Barbie

The Babysitter, Barbie, The Murph

Throwing the empty wine bottles away...